I fell for a girl the other day.
Just wipe that smirk off your face (If you are grinning, then its even worse), this ain't a thing to be happy about. Especially in principle. Over the years, embittered by ridiculous relationships and watching close friends/acquaintances (will write their experiences) undergo unimaginably messy and complex break-ups, or worse still, 'adjust' to painful after effects -- I have willfully and cleverly chosen the single life, the carefree gait of a string-free, singularly well-dressed butterfly and the eye of the tiger ( like a survivor). That being the mantra, life's all about toppling off the wagon.
Which brings us to line one in this piece, the confession that I was recently (Ahem!) smitten. There, I said it. I met a fascinating, petite thing a few days ago in the middle of my exams, and just couldn't get enough. We talked for a little while that day, exchanged phone numbers, promised to be in touch….. On the way back home, I realized I could not stop thinking about her. I gave a call immediately I reached home & called her and started the conversation with the lame excuse “I wanted to check if your cell was working”. Oops! Anyhow, the way she laughed made it up for it. One conversation led to another and I was down and out in the mystical region of Ahem….LoVe! Anyway, the chick (with a nose to kill for, I kid you not) is tremendous fun. And halfway through past five on date two, the dastardly suggestion slithers onto my unsuspecting head that I might actually want a serious and long lasting relationship with her, this time around.
Damn these hormones, pheromones etc… I didn't instantly coil into a front-foot defense. She rocks, and this could just work. Yeppy! On hindsight, I remember the pessimistic portion of my brain screaming “Dhruv, Back out, Back out…Until its too late”. But being the chivalrous and brave gentleman I am, I went ahead! The man-woman thing is all about balance. With the precision of a racing driver, you have to instinctively find the perfect line and then play with its limits. Go aggressive, fall behind, keep things loose or tight as needed. Some girls want a knight, some a night. You have to play your cards with 007ian self-assurance, leaping from cad to cardinal in a heartbeat. Therein lies, young reader, the thrill of the chase.
This was the issue with other prospects as I thought…. But the issue with being in love, of course, is that you trip headlong over your own shoelaces.
Suddenly, I cared -- about everything. Scanning text messages for subtext & hidden meanings, wondering what she meant when she replied too quick, or too late, and then trying hard to decipher all the conversations -- why she mentions her love for the songs of Kishore Kumar(yuk!!!), gauging her level of laughter at what you consider a particularly witty routine, and whether she really wants the new.
When in a fix, your logical abilities go for a toss. I was desperately seeking counsel from my closest lady friends (never, ever, take a man's advice when it comes to relationships) who all seemed to react in the same fashion. They sat back with a smug smile, laughed their heads off and told me, with their best the-hunter-becomes-the-game phrase, that the tables had turned.
That I had it bad, though, wasn't the worst part. The absolute pits was the realisation that while I knew I was just setting myself up, I was, um, enjoying myself. AS I SAID I DON’T KNOW IF I AM IN LOVE…. BUT THEN LIFE HAS NEVER BEEN SO BEAUTIFUL!!!!!